Since I won't be needing the whole road sign theme any longer, I went back to my roots with a very minimal look with wonderful orange accents. I also added a little foreshadow by way of the background image as to what my new source of income will be for the time being.
If you guessed 'telemarketing', you are correct - but only if you answered in the form of a question and a rhetorical one at that. The correct response should be something like:
Telemarketing?!?!?!?!
I'm desperate for a job and I need that job to start right now. I really don't have time for the whole pursuit of employment shell game right now. I don't have weeks to fill out applications, fax or hand deliver resumes, call to inquire about the status of my application, hopefully schedule an interview during that phone call or a later follow up phone call, woo and impress and negotiate terms during the actual interview, wait for the call back while trying to maintain the perfect balance between desperate and disinterested by not calling them until the exact precise moment, and blah blah blah right now. I need a job immediately and this is one of few jobs that is always hiring and will have me working in days rather than weeks.
I don't officially have the job yet. I just have an interview for Monday. I'm not all that concerned about it. Interviews for jobs like these are formalities at best.
I have submitted about twenty applications. That number does not include this job since I didn't fill out an application for this job. I just dialed a number and answered a few questions over the phone. That's how easy it was and perfect for my situation. The job offers thirty days of paid training - which seems a little absurd and excessive to me, but whatever - which I will be using to pursue those twenty other employment opportunities while collecting a paycheck for doing what already comes naturally to me. It's an obvious bastardization, but desperate times call for equally desperate measures.
I was given the option to enter either the commercial or non-profit program. I chose non-profit because I really rather not be cold-calling people and trying to sell them ridiculous products and services. The non-profit programs available were religious, humanitarian, and political groups. I believe it all involves fundraising. I'll decide which of the three programs to join on Monday, or it might actually be chosen for me. I don't actually have a preference. It's all different shades of green.
So... There's that. Also, I haven't told anyone yet about any of this. I really don't feel like explaining any of this. Maybe I'll break the news to the family after my interview - depending on how it goes. At any rate, their knowledge of the situation and reaction to it are not much of a priority at the moment. My only priority is getting a job - any job at all. I should have that taken care of in a few days.
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